Cocktail Onions

Priest Off

Ricky Martin officially comes out.

Yeah, that's right. Ricky Marty is officially on our team. (I guess it's better than some of the other trash we have over here on the dark side...) In other news, the sky is blue.

GaGa is cooking with pure WIN

Thanks to my good friend Heat for pointing out this wonderfully delicious Cooking Mama parody art starring none other than Lady GaGa herself, complete with her "Telephone" get-up. I would definitely play a game about cooking poison honey for unsuspecting diner patrons. Major props to DeviantArt user capitannathan for his sexy portrayal of the freak bitch.

I am apparently attracted to douchebags…

Seriously. I think this guy is faaaahhhheeeeen. (Yeah. I don't have much on my mind lately, and I'm as busy as ever...)

Turn the tub around ♫

I love you Megan Mullally, you and your ability to make a butter commercial the coolest thing since sliced bread. (See what I did there?) Thanks go to Eric and his Facebook for turning me on to this.

What the fuck are they putting in Friskies nowadays?

It's like that cat stepped into the afterlife of The Lovely Bones.

Dora gets fat and hangs out with Jesus

You will wildly benefit from watching these hilarious Flash videos of a little girl narrating stories about Dora the Explorer, presumably animated by her incredibly talented father. Sometimes I wish I could have a kid so I could manipulate their inane cuteness for cybernetic recognition. (Thanks for sharing, Sketch.) http://www.somethingawful.com/d/flash-tub/dora-gets-fat.php http://www.somethingawful.com/d/flash-tub/dora-jesus-cartoon.php

Furniture so ugly, you won’t even want to put your ass on it!

I’m such a fuck’n girl.

It's a little known fact that I was absolutely obsessed with the Sailor Moon reruns that used to play on Cartoon Network. Aside from Pokémon, it was the first anime I really got into. I had every single episode (from the four seasons that were dubbed) on VHS tape, self-recorded, commercial-free. It was, quite frankly, an obsession. I'd love to actually own all of the series (in original uncut, subtitled format) on DVD, but that is an extremely costly investment. Anyway, I digress. Apparently ...

No more Mr. Brown Eye

I cannot even begin to express just how fucking hilarious this is. What's more hilarious is the handful of friends I have that will probably invest in these. You know who you are. Is your pet feeling left in the dirt because of his/her unsightly rear? I’ve got them covered... Rear Gear is handmade in Portland, OR and offers a cheerful solution to be-rid your favorite pet’s un-manicured back side. Rear Gear comes in many designs including a disco ball, air freshener, heart, flower, biohazar...